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THE VALENCE, HOW IT WORKS

GOALS PACKAGE: BALANCE OF VALENCES AND IDENTIFICATION

A lecture given on 1 January 1962 A lecture given on 1 January 1962

Thank you. Oh, you like me better today. All right. All right. Okay.

Thank you.

I want to drink to you. Happy AD 12. They didn't think we'd make it, but we did. We did. AD 12. In case we drink another toast, there it is.

Well, here we approach the next-to-the-last lecture of the thing. And let me tell you something. We could probably go on for days. I could probably tell you all about this Goals Problem Mass. By the time we finally finished up you would probably all be OT or something — or totally plowed in — who knows which one.

I was just telling Reg and Bonnie in a moment of fun — I was just telling them in a moment of fun that psychology has attained its quota, its nadir, and so forth. After a great deal of expenditure of funds lasting over a period of many, many decades and so forth — after tremendous expenditure of funds — billions, you see — psychology finally discovered that if you boot a pig in its posterior, it squeals. This is stimulus-response mechanisms — and there we will leave them. I'm very fond of . . . You realize that it was an effort to suppress psychology that caused Roosevelt to plow in all those pigs. Did you realize that? The far-reaching consequences of that particular program have never ceased to reverberate and we will keep them reverberating.

Let me tell you that the running of 3D is interesting, fascinating and excruciating! We don't — we don't pull any punches on this.

But I can warn you against making a similar experiment because the work has been done. Use a psychologist instead. The price of pork is far too high just now.

There is no particular reason for you to believe that processing has suddenly become very easy; it is not. As you step up the velocity on the overwhump of the mind, its aberrations, you get the reactive mind. You start overwhumping this thing; you are going up against every fighting valence that you've ever 'ad, every apathetic one and every one that 'urt like 'ell. You fortunately, however, don't run them out pain by pain. In Dianetics, 1950, you ran it out pain by pain. Scientology, 1962, you run it out scream by scream.

Now, I like to begin a new year with a serious mien and lofty thoughts. I'm very happy to be able to contribute this to 1962, in order to set a tone for psychotherapy, psychology and psychiatry throughout this year. We wish them very good luck. We wish them very good luck. Poor chaps. Their boots are almost worn out.

Frankly, you won't be able to take it — be too much for you. It's almost that — too much for me.

Now that we have disposed of that, I haven't anything to talk to you about today because you see, I planned a two-day congress and I arrived to find we had a three-day congress. And I hadn't made up any notes and lectures, you see, for the third day. So it's all just random, you see, from there on. And the end lecture of the congress actually was havingness. See? I was supposed to give you lots of havingness and then you could go home very happily and have havingness, and so forth. And now there's no telling what will happen. You'll have to come to the party and get processed at the HGC and so forth, in order to pick up your havingness. I intended to give it to you because today will probably as-is the lot.

I used to be able to as-is engrams by inspection. First time I tried that with a valence, it spit back. It is fascinating.

The difficulties of trying to maintain one's havingness in this particular universe at this particular time are of course considerable.

Do you know that no command or process that we have had over these many years fazes a 3D Goals Problem Mass except 3D processes. You might as well just skip running anything else but the exact process that is pre-scribed for 3D. I spent two weeks going over the processes we had had over a decade, trying to take them apart and find out which one worked. There was only one series ever worked on 3D and that is using the Prehav Scale as solutions to problems. The Goals Problem Mass is a series of problems; the valences are there as solutions to problems and problems alone take apart this lot.

One of the reasons you have difficulty maintaining your havingness is probably you haven't got the havingness to which you were accustomed. I can see a very pretty girl out in the audience out there and she says, "That's true. That's true, you know. That's true." Sleek sport car, you know. Furs. Lovely apartment, you know, with the potted palms as you see them through the glass bricks, nice maid, full wardrobe, total income and no husband. Havingness. Yep. Yep. Probably a good thing she hasn't attained them though. I'll tell you that confidentially. I won't tell her that but I'll tell the rest of you. It's a good thing she probably hasn't attained them because the young men in Los Angeles have enough trouble. They have enough trouble — being pestered on the streets all the time.

Now, there are many ways you could take apart a problem. There are many ways you could go into this. There are many ways the situation could be ameliorated, alleviated and your life could be made easier. The first and-foremost way to have life made easier for you is to have an expert auditor. That is something that you really should have. You deserve that. I am trying like crazy to give you that — like mad — and I am succeeding very, very well. I am very proud of the auditors we are turning out these days, very proud of them.

Anyhow, now nobody said a word about Los Angeles, but we now in Scientology have a — an overt on Los Angeles. Hitherto, we've had nothing but motivators but now we have an overt. Williams was down there the other day and he made it his business — this is probably a paraphrase — to drive all over town and say, wherever a Californian can hear him, "Nice village you have here." That was actually done so that we could have an overt on Los Angeles. It's been a hard time getting one. Because the motivators are flying so thick and fast that you haven't any time to look up and cook yourself up a very good overt.

And don't let it make you feel that all of those years of training is wasted. Let me tell you — we take somebody who was trained yesterday and we try to teach them how to do this sort of thing and he just hasn't got the background necessary to resolve the case. It takes you with all of your fits and starts and fallings on your head and seeing which way it's wrong and the experiential pattern of the past background, and knowing how many mistakes you can make, and knowing how screwy pcs can get and knowing that all cases are rough cases. Knowing practically everything that you know makes it very much easier to take apart the things that we are taking apart. Although 3D is a very finite activity, it is a very precise activity. And though it apparently could be learned by anybody who could hold an E-Meter balanced neatly upon their map [lap], who knows what they would do if anything went wrong.

And I want to recommend to you the therapeutic values of a good overt — a nice, good overt. That is actually — do you realize . . . You realize, of course, that your withholds are mostly composed of not having a good, satisfactory overt. You realize that? It's probably why you were withholding. You recognize that?

They wouldn't understand any part of what was going on, they really wouldn't. So don't despair over the great amount of training you have had which you don't need now.

In case you get any ideas, why, of course you immediately afterwards have a tendency to withhold twice as much, but that's beside the point. In that split instant there, when you're remedying your havingness of overts, you see — in that split instant there — it is very enjoyable no matter how much you pay for it afterwards.

Let me tell you something. One thing alone stood in the road of your ability to audit — one thing alone — not you. Oh, people audit a lot better when they get a 3D run and that sort of thing but we are clearing a world with auditors who aren't cleared. Do you realize that we couldn't clear a world with auditors who were Clear — not because Clear auditors couldn't audit — but who would ever clear the Clear auditors so that they could clear people? You'd never get anybody Clear — isn't that right?

I had a pal one time, back about 1930, when I was trying to keep from going to college. We went on a barnstorming trip out of Washington here and we were flying an old — I think it was an airplane, I think. It had an engine; had wheels. Personally, I believe he picked it off the ground and carried it around in the air. I don't think it had anything to do with the aerodynamics of flight, because looking over the aerodynamics of that aircraft since, I haven't been able to find any flying characteristics in it of any kind whatsoever.

If everybody had to wait until all the auditors were Clear — I've had various schemes, various schemes proposed to me such as "Let's all knock off and not do any more auditing and then you clear one person and then teach him how to audit, and then he will clear two people and teach them how to audit, and each one of them will clear two people and teach them how to audit and then they clear them and dhuh-dhuh-dhuh-duh-duh-booh-dhuh-dhuh-boohbooh-booh-booh-duh — I think German General Staff, circa 1914, is called a schema. Ever hear — it's spelled "schema," pronounced "shayma." It's idiotic progression.

This was almost as bad as the type of aircraft just a little earlier than that. The way they test whether or not a flying wire was gone between the two wings, they'd turn a pigeon loose, and if it escaped, why, there was a wire gone.

Go ahead and get a subjective reality on auditing after it's all been run out. Go ahead and try. You won't know what it's all about. If you were perfectly audited and there was absolutely never a flub on the line, there was nothing ever went wrong, it just all went out very smoothly, you'd say, "How easy this is!" And then you would learn how to audit and you'd go through your Academy and everything is very fine and you learn everything very fast and get to learn bulletins — pschoop — and there's nothing to that. And you say, "Well, E-Meter, I don't know why anybody would have any trouble with that — pschoop." And you would get all that. And it is all set, and everything's fine, and you say, "This meter, oh, this marvelous meter, yes and so on." "So it's very easy; it's very easy."

Yeah. These were the days. I remember sitting out here at Congressional Airport in a soaring plane about to take off on a stunting exhibition where they were having an air show. I used to stunt soaring planes. You almost didn't have me here. I don't think anybody else has ever dared do it since.

And you sit down and you're all set to do an assessment and so forth. And the pc has a dirty needle — "scratchy needle" the students at Saint Hill are calling them. It goes zzzz-bzzz-zzzz-zzz-zz-zz-zz-zzz-zzz-zz-zz. And you say, "Cats, rats, kings and coal heavers" — it doesn't matter what you say. The needle goes zzzz-zzzz-zzzz-zzzz-zzzz-zzz-zzz-zz-zzzz-zzzz-zzz-zz. You say, "Mother-in-law." Zzzz-zzzz-zzz-zzz-zz. No reaction. You can't find any reaction on the needle of any kind whatsoever except zzz-zzz-zzz.

And I was sitting there and I was feeling very proud and very manly, you know. I was sort of flexing my biceps. I had a white helmet on and some nice, shiny man's field boots and I was feeling really the stuff, you know. Really feeling the stuff. Masculine, manly, brave, you know and so forth. And a newspaper photographer came up and he said, "Do you mind if I take your picture, miss?" White flying helmet. How could he tell, you know? I've still got that picture. I'll have to show it to you someday.

I think about that time you'd say, "Well, the textbook is wrong and let's find a pc that's much easier." So you got to find a pc that is much easier and you get started with the assessment and you are just going fine. You've got all the goals and you found the pc's goal rather easily and you found the opposition terminal rather easily, and you have found the opposition goal rather easily and you found the modifier. And the — and the needle goes bzzzzzz-zzz-zzz. And then you would say, "Ron — Ron said, all you had to do was repeat the modifier — repeat the modifier to the pc several times and the needle would start to read and the whole package would start to read. That's good." Bzzz-zzz-zzz-zzz-zzz-zzz-zzz. You say, "Jump." (That's the modifier.) "Jump! Jump! Jump! Jump!" Bzzz-bzzz-bzzz-zzz-zzz-zzz-zzz-zzz-zzz. You say, "Well, that — that — that pc — that pc is — that — that — that — that — something wrong with that. It doesn't follow the textbook, see. So let's find another pc." Bzzz-zzz-zzz-zz.

But anyway, this old pal of mine who used to fly around a lot — he used to have a philosophy. It had a lot to do with overts and withholds. He'd get so tired of withholding from having an accident that when he saw that it was inevitable, absolutely inevitable that he was going to have an accident with a car or something of the sort, he'd immediately make a postulate to make it a good one. Well, you always crabbed afterwards that it was hard on the fuselage and so forth, but I'm sure he found it was enjoyable at that split instant of time. A good overt.

What? What was the matter? Well, you see, the fellow couldn't remember anything and he came in to get audited — he came in to get audited so that he could remember where his door key is because he's been locked out for several weeks. He came in to get audited. He has troubles. He is not interested in who he was last life; he's trying to find out who he is this life.

The reason man is having so much trouble is factually he can't have action without overts today. Well, it's an awful overt against you. You get in an automobile and you put it on the highway — overt against your body. And it's on the highway and you start wheeling it up and revving it up. I don't know. They're rather low speeds on this particular planet. You get it up to about 120, 130 miles an hour and you're going down the highway. You put it in the ditch. Meat body — meat bodies are softer than windshields. Meat bodies are softer than steering columns, and so forth.

Of course, some old-time auditor taking a look at this would say, "What do you know. I wonder what this is all about." You see — say to the pc, "Whatcha do? Whatcha been doing? What's going on? What's going on?"

Overt. Start moving fast. It's an overt. You get up in an aircraft and the pilot can't quite make up his mind 150 feet above the runway, just as he's taking off, and decides to go back. And they scrape the passengers and the pilot, you see, off the runway. What's left of the charred embers has the benefit of selling more newspapers — about the only benefit that crash had.

"Oh, nothing."

One mustn't go fast on this planet. One mustn't make any speed because if he does, he'll get an impact greater than the body he has is capable of withstanding. That true?

"Yeah, well, what's it look like?"

How did you rig yourself up so that you could hurt that bad? That's what's interesting. How did you do that? Pretty good trick.

"Well, it's about that long and about that wide and I hid it under the mat and it's not there anymore."

Checking speed. Checking against speed. Mustn't go fast. Mustn't make any speed because the velocity, of course, brings about an impact which is far greater than anything you would really care to experience. And you get taught to go slow. And as you get taught to go slow, your cycle of life gets less. The slower you go, the shorter you live. Not reversewise. Till you get short cycles of action. Till you get a lifetime you can't get anything done in. A lot of people around — you ask them, they'll say, well, they're not going to live until they're thirty or they're going to die when they're twenty-five. Did you ever hear anybody say anything like that? Well, they've sort of surrendered to this short cycle of action. How long does it take to really get educated, get going and have some fun in a society? I'd say a good life's span was four or five thousand years. You might be able to find your feet. You might be able to find your way around if you had a proper life span.

And you know factually, I'm not kidding you now. Anybody that hadn't been over the jumps to any degree at all — I can tell you how auditors will be trained in the future. They will be trained by starting them in on Book One and having them audit engrams — probably take us ten years to train them. Their postgraduate course will be this congress. These poor people that came up because Ron always gives something simpler in a PE, you know. I mean — I have been having a ball this congress. I'm sorry, folks, really. You come in July and I'll make several lectures — several lectures even more incomprehensible.

Look at the franticness that anybody who's trying to make money or straighten anything out is put up against. Look at this tremendous franticness. Awful franticness. He's got to make it within what? Well, he can't start making it till he's about at least eighteen, nineteen, twenty — something like that. And his — the speed with which he can travel probably starts slowing down at the time he's about sixty, which gives him a total span there of something in the neighborhood of about forty years.

Here's — the point is that you wouldn't know what the ramifications or limits of the mind were. How wrong can the mind go? I can just see some-body starting to run a 3D who knows nothing about past track and he all of a sudden says, "Hey!" I can see it now. I get a telex — telex comes out of the machine, you know, and the paper keeps coming out of the machine and climbing up the wall, you know. And, "We're terribly worried. We had this preclear and he saw a picture. And the picture was himself as an executioner and we've been trying to run this picture so that we could get on with it and all we get to register on the whole thing is an executioner, but he claims that it isn't his valence. And we can't get 'executioner' to register on the thing and the case is all balled up and we don't know what we are doing."

Forty years he's got to build it all up, get it all in place and then enjoy it. He's got to do all this in forty years. And you never saw some men working so hard to enjoy what they have worked so hard to put together in your life. And you go down to Miami right now — I imagine there's older chaps going up and down the street there, wiping the sweat off their brows — no, it's ice cold down there just now. I just had a personal report on the matter. But they're going up and down, breath in front of their faces, beating their arms against their parkas, hurrying around trying to have a good time while there's still some time in which to have a good time in, you see, before it all evaporates and they drop the mock-up.

And I would send them back a nice understanding telex. I can always be counted on to do this sort of thing and I would say, "I agree with you completely. You don't know what you are doing." See, that as-ises the situation.

And this gets to a sort of a franticness after a while. And this franticness gets to the point of where, well, you'd better drop the mock-up because you can't win anyhow. There you get short cycle longevity.

Every once in a while somebody calls upon me to do a complete education on the subject of Scientology in one short letter, see, and that would be very easy. It isn't that these things are important, but these things exist and a person who has never seen that these things exist — a person hasn't a clue that they exist — will keep running into them and he would find himself called upon to go back over the whole thing anyhow and it would all look like strange worlds to him. They'd have these great big trees in it with these branches that would look like they were coming down, see, and all of these paths that go through and every once in a while wolves jump out with these night bonnets on.

But isn't it interesting that the valences that you're wearing may or may not have anything to do with the body or life span which you are in at this particular moment. Isn't that interesting?

And they pick up this thing about Freud because that's all true too and then they get everybody running out — running out their desires for eating sausages or something, you see. And then they decide that, well, actually the best thing to do is sit down and contemplate your navel and there goes Scientology. Don't you see what would happen?

Your valence. You will hear a great deal about this sometime up in the future here, not too long. Your valence. Of course, your valence merely means that thing which you attacked enough to become. That's all that — that's all that is.

Do you realize there are a lot of phenomena in the mind? There are a lot of things — there's a lot of gimmicks, there's a lot of whatnots, there's a lot of buttons — there's fantastic numbers of things. Some valence you've got right this minute parked with those eight hundred thousand other valences latched on top of it that wouldn't even assess out — some valence that you have never dramatized, you had paid no attention to, that has never bothered you at all — has more aberration cooked up in it, more aberration and twisteroos in it (this is one that you wouldn't even handle) than Freud ever met. That's right, just one of these little valences.

And the opposition terminal, that's something which you also hoped would overcome it. Very interesting thing, this Goals Problem Mass, because it's composed of identities. Full packaged identities. They think and walk and talk and key out and key in. As your havingness goes down, in comes the valence. Havingness goes up a little bit and the valence may or may not go out.

All of this came about, by the way, by an understanding of this one fact. You know these profiles they've been having you do? You know, you go in and you find out if you are still abreacting your hostilities, you know? And you write down — you fill out all these forms. Do you know what you're testing? You're testing what valence you're in because the resulting graph is a picture of the personality of a valence.

A valence. Now, formerly you thought perhaps we were talking about a thought or an idea of beingness. We're not talking about a thought or an idea of beingness. When you corral one of these valences and look at it and adjust your ability to see, the thing is usually a black mass and very often, by the way, has arms and legs. What do you know? Huh! Or antenna. It all depends on what you've been up to with that valence, you see.

Now, you can change that valence — that's possible — and so you get a change of graph by changing the valence. That's possible. But there is some-thing much more possible about the thing that you would be far more interested in. How about changing the valence? We audit the person, we change the valence.

No. It'll be a full-packaged identity. It's quite amazing. Quite amazing. Now you yourself have collided with these things in your nightmares. You've been tired or had too many drinks of — I think it's Calvert is what gives you dt's. That's the best thing to drink to have dt's. It used to be. I don't know about now. I don't drink now — stopped having any effect on me and it's a "so what" now, you know. But Calvert used to be the stuff that'd give you delirium tremens in an awful hurry. And you drink some of that and all of a sudden you're talking to a black ghost out in front of you or something like this, you know. There are people around that lie up half the night processing the black thetans up in the corner. You ever hear of anybody doing anything like that? Well, they do. This is true. This is the world as it is, not as we hope it will remain. Some fellow has an emotional shock and he suddenly feels like something has walked into his face. Not quite sure what it is. He's lying down. All of a sudden, he has a pain in the center of his head but it isn't his head that's hurting.

Well, do you realize that's your big graph changes? Your big graph changes all stem from having run out a valence in which the pc was in, that was giving him a lot of trouble. And there it went with its somatic packages and everything else. He didn't necessarily get another valence right on top of it as seriously as that.

We take somebody up to the hospital and turn him over to medical treatment. The medical boys will know what to do at this particular time and age. They haven't started putting on too many artificial limbs at this time. They cut off his leg. He has hangnails or frozen toenails or something and they cut off his leg. They generally cut it off two or three times, ankle, thigh, neck, you see? They want to make sure and also get a double — triple fee. So much easier, you know, to collect a fee from an estate rather than from a person. Did you recognize this as one of the economics of medicine? Estate always pays up because it's got all the insurance money now. You never recognized that, did you?

But you're sort of potluck — what valence picture are you running out?

Chinese don't work it this way. They pay their doctor as long as they stay well. The second they get sick, they stop the bill. That's it. But anyway, the individual all of a sudden has his leg cut off. Everything's fine now except his toes itch. Before, he at least could scratch his toes. Now he can't scratch his toes. That's been the total gain of having his leg sawed off. No. He's still got a leg. It's a valence leg. It isn't a ghost leg or what they think it is. Or it's — it isn't the nerves playing tricks on the mind. There is still a mass down there sufficiently thin that it doesn't reflect light. That's all that amounts to. And this thinness, of course, makes the thing invisible. But it's still a mass and it still has the sensory perceptions of a leg. Have you ever heard of this sort of thing?

All right, we got one way up here at the top of the scale — yeah, that's way up here, you know. You get up and you look up like this to find this valence, you know, serene, sweet, full responsibility, critical — never! And there it is, you know? It'd gone up higher except you ran out of paper. And you say, "Boy, how ideal that is, see — how marvelous that is."

Male voice: Yeah.

That valence folds up — you have to get over and get inside the lines on the graph paper, you know. And you look down there and way down there someplace — way down there, it says, "Too vicious, no responsibility, always loses, can't have nothing." I'm trying to find it on this "critical" scale here. It says, "There's no use damning them — damn them!" And you say, "Well, I sure ruined that pc." No, you sure ruined this valence._

Well, all of this is valence phenomena. All of this is valence phenomena. You get an idea of — oh, there's odd things. Somebody's mother died one time and all of a sudden he had hundreds of voices were — just started yapping all over his body and all around him, and so forth. Just yap, yap, yap, yap, yap, yap, yap, yap, yap. Everybody talking at once and so forth. Like to drive him around the bend. Couldn't make head or tail out of it. He figured he was haunted. He was. He was. Absolutely. The most accurate estimate he has ever made of anything — probably the only time he's ever made an accurate estimate of anything. He was haunted. Had an emotional shock and everything starts talking.

This valence was the escape valence — that is the — that's not a technical term — it's just what the person became, see, after they were the head sacrificial priest, you see. That's this bottom valence, you see. And when they — when they finally — finally got absolutely convinced at that time that they just couldn't stand their arthritis in the hand, you know — the arthritis pains in the hand. Every time they picked up the sacrificial knife, you know — these arthritis pains, they'd go on, you know. And they just couldn't stand this anymore, and so forth, and know — slitting the blood of the victim and all that sort of thing, you know — slitting his throat and all of that kind of thing. They were just getting to a point where — hands too shaky, you know — arthritic and shaky. They couldn't stand that anymore, see, so they couldn't hold the post anymore. So they took the next best thing, see, which is the left ear of the starboard incense pot, and boy, is that incense pot serene. It's being fully responsible — but it never does nothing — but it never criticizes a thing. And, of course, the incense pot turns around and comes in at the bottom and you find yourself with a priest on your hands.

I refer you to Dianetics: The Modern Science of Mental Health and its discussion of circuits. Well, let's take another look at circuits and recognize that they are whole package beingnesses. And you might as well call them valences because they are identities, and they have name, ranks and serial numbers. An experiment one time — I had an ache in my back and an ache in my skull and an ache in my knee, and I was down in Phoenix, Arizona and there were enough things going on to make almost anything ache.

Well, in 3D it goes this way. Well, that — you did that in ordinary auditing — it wasn't that the fellow picked up the next somatics of the valence — nothing crude as that. In 3D this is what happens: You get the thing all packaged out and you find your pc up here at the top. And you're running this very nicely and everything is fine and all of a sudden, after you have run it for a long time, why, you come on at the bottom and the pc has never had arthritis in this lifetime. And the pc wakes up in the morning with full-blown arthritis and tries to eat breakfast, you see. And they put down their fork and their knife and they say, "Come on, I better get hold of myself here — I better get hold of myself here." And they decide they don't want any breakfast and they phone you and they say — and you expect a complaint — but they say, "I feel awful! Boy, have I got horrible somatics!" The guy has been living all of his life, you know, in a vacuum, you know — no feeling. He lights a cigarette, forgets to put out the match, you see; and about the time his finger burns away up to the second joint, he notices it. See? It's a big change to this guy to be able to put his hand down on a pin and hurt, see, or to feel any pains in his fingers at all. It's marvelous to behold.

And I said — this was pretty rough, everything cutting up in the way of somatics. Too busy to have a session, so I said, "Shut up." And they did. That was it. They weren't talking. They were simply hurting, you know. Shut up. They did. Stayed off for fifteen minutes. Never felt better in my life for about fifteen minutes. And then one of them got brave. Very easy to personalize or personificate in that particular way but you are discouraged from doing this. You believe that any — if anybody has voices or beingnesses or identities in him that he's nuts, as a definition of being crazy.

Well, he just gets used to these somatics as a priest and he's accustoming himself to these things, you see. He gets maybe a whole session or three or four sessions or maybe — maybe if you are going slow and got the rudiments out and you should have studied a little harder — eight, ten, twelve sessions. He's got these somatics, you see, and he's still going, you know — up like this a little bit, and he says, "Lookit, you know. This is quite interesting, you know. That's a priest — ever — you know? Every time I do that — pick up the knife, you know, and cut peoples' throa — thuh-thuh-thuh — throats."

I'll give you another definition for being crazy. A person who cannot perceive his own valences is slightly off. And that includes all of us. Now these are packaged beingnesses. They are just as though you'd built them up out of jelly beans and electric light cords and so forth, except they are too thin to reflect light.

And he just gets used to this, see. He gets so he can live with this thing — he gets so he can live with this thing. And he is lighting a cigarette one day, "I wonder if that would burn? I wonder if that would burn? Suppose that would burn? I wonder if this'd burn?" And you go back — you can't find this valence anymore and you've got the next valence, and you are getting — it's a temple burner downer. And of course, the lower harmonic of a temple burner downer would of course be an incense pot of being burned down all the time, wouldn't it?

And when you exteriorize, why, you very often exteriorize in a valence. Sometimes you don't exteriorize in a valence, however. Now the mystic has collided with this down through the millennia and he has called them astral self — the astral body. The mystic has always known what we were talking about when we were talking about exteriorization. Always has known and known all about it — so much so that they've never been able to find out what we mean by exteriorization because they're thinking and talking about the exit of a valence.

Well, it doesn't go a — quite according to that plan or anywhere near that evenly, but I put it in that guise just to give you an idea of what it is. These things upgrade and downgrade and they do all sorts of weird things, and if you had to run out every single one of these valences, why we would just never get around to it.

Back in London many years ago, about 1953 I guess it was — something like that — I used to get somebody to exteriorize as an astral self, you see? You know, as a valence. And then get him, the thetan, to exteriorize from the valence — 1, 2, you see. Well, it wasn't successful in very many cases because I didn't know at that time you'd had to have him exteriorize as a valence and then exteriorize from valence 1, valence 2, valence 3, valence 4, valence 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10 and you would run out of adding machines, slide rules and computers before you finally got through with the number of valences he'd have to exteriorize out of.

Actually, there are only four, five, six packages that have any real bearing on the case and these packages are all of them handleable to a greater or lesser degree. They are all handleable with fantastic somatics — don't kid yourself.

You is populated! Some of the most — best populated people in the world pass through these doors, you know. Oddly enough, it's an easy method of beingness — is what these things amount to. At one time they would have considerable use no matter how they were built up, so a thetan has wanted them at some time or another.

But the triumph — some fellow says, "Man, I thought I'd had somatics before but the back of my head is absolutely coming off. Yes, sir, it's sort of . . ." you know, there's a certain pride in the matter. "I bet the back of your head never came off like that, you know. Do you want to see the back of my head? I'll take it off and show it to you."

You got into a certain situation, why, cling-bang! You got into a cage full of lions, you just picked up one of your old valences as a lion tamer, and bang! You had it made, you see.

That back there — that's a hoplite. Do you know what a hoplite is? Do you know what a hoplite is? A hoplite is a Greek soldier and they have disci, you know. They keep throwing — you know, in the Olympic games they have these disci, you know — you've seen these disci. Actually that was a war weapon — this guy will tell you, see. That was a war weapon and you took them like this, you know, and you went like this and finally pshew! See? Dang!

But one by one these things failed and then you didn't throw them away because there was no way to throw them away and you never as-ised them and they built up one way or the other and you lived lives as this and lives as that. Well, what do you think happened to all the lives you've lived as some-thing else?

These tin helmets — they really were made out of tin. After you smacked a guy — I'm sure that's what that is — I'm sure that's what that is. That's a pretty close approximation of what that is.

You realize you go out in the sun now and the photons hit you in the face and you resist and you cry and you weep and you eat and you have overts and you have withholds and all of these various things. And your body has a form and shape and you put clothes over it and you stick pins in your fingers and get operated on and psychotherapized and so forth; and all kinds of disasters occur to you.

Anyhow, we are running a hoplite, that's what we are running today. Yeah, that's — greaves, you know, so forth — chestplate. You can feel it now, as a matter of fact. Do you know what happens to you when you get cold with a metal chestplate on? The guy is quite an authority on this subject and about the time he's really a good authority on this subject and he really knows all about it, why, it's gone; it's gone. He — mysteriously non sequitur — why you're now running a court lady.

Well, what exactly is happening? Well, you are actually building a body all the time you are doing this. You're constructing a body within or a body over a body. Naturally, you get an engram — have you ever seen an engram hang up an injury? Well, when the engram was run out, the injury disappeared. Well, let's have an analogy between a body and an injury. You haven't ever run the body out that you've lived with before. Well, where is it? Well, there were a whole bunch of facsimiles and all kinds of various bric-a-brac of one kind or another there. I mean, there's ... Well, let's take your life now as a citizen of this continent. Well, let's be extravagant. Let's make it ... You could be fairly unreal; between the years 1920 and 1962. See? Take some far flown example like this. Some imaginative example. Let's say you'd lived a life on this particular continent during 1920 and 1962, you know, past life of some kind or another or future life.

And he says, "Have you got any idea," he says, "how you are supposed to act in court? Hm? You are supposed to act in court? Have you any idea of the deportment of a court lady? Any idea at all? There are seventeen ways you back away from a throne, did you realize that? All of them dangerous."

All right. Now, it's real enough while you're living it, isn't it? Audience: Yes.

Well, now if it were just pictures of valences that we were interested in and characteristics of valences and so forth, it might be rather dull, but that isn't what we are interested in at all. Every one of these valences is in a fight. It's agin things that are agin it. The pc's attention is never on the single beingness of it all. As a matter of fact the beingness of it all is very junior to the doingness, and the doingness of it is absolutely fantastic. The doingness of it — what it is doing it to, and so forth.

Real enough while you're living it.

And for the first few runs of the thing, why the opposition terminals are rather vague. Well, they're — they're over there and you — we don't have much to do with them and so forth. And then we finally run into a full-blown collision with these things. But the point is, the warfare of life is represented in these problems and every one of these beingnesses is part of a problem. And the only reason it's suspended in time is the beingness is there, still charging flat out toward the opposition beingness.

What you going to do with this life? You realize it's got facsimiles, it's got thinkingnesses. It's got education. It's got habit patterns. It's got all of this, that, and the other thing. What are you going to do with this life? What are you going to do with it? Because it's going to be residual as a body. Certainly, it's a body. We used to run engrams, just to tell somebody, "Get into your own valence." We were very gentle about it in those days. Never persuaded anybody. Never persuaded anybody when we could force them to do it. Get into your own valence, you know. Guy would and the engram would run out, of course.

You have the willow wand in the wind. There's a willow wand and it's leaning hard up against the wind. And there's the wind and it's blowing hard against the willow wand. There's the water buck and the tiger. And the tiger versus the waterbuck. These are the packages and they are called packages because the single valences could not exist unless they were suspended in time against other valences, and that is the whole trick. The reason they are suspended is because there is another valence. It is a two-terminal universe.

But when he started running past track things and we told him to get into his own valence, you know, he sometimes couldn't. And that's more or less what defeats engram running.

And the reason why you are baffled is while you are busy being a hoplite, you keep adjusting your hair and backing away from thrones. And no hoplite would do that quite that way and you are never quite satisfied if you are looking at it from a life point of view. Every time you think of being a soldier,you fix your hair. Well, you could rationalize that out and you can figure that all out, "Well, of course, a soldier wouldn't fix his hair and let's see in a battle it's a long — a bad thing to have long hair, because enemy soldiers can grab you by the hair and pull your hair out and slit your throat and so forth. So it is a bad thing to have hair, and I guess that's why — that is why I am always concerned about hair."

Well, what is this thing, valence? Well, the valence is what's got the pictures. The valence has got the pictures. Ho-ho. It's the valence that's got the ideas. It's the valence that's got the "now-I'm-supposed-to's." Valence that's got the interpersonal relationships. You, by your name, right this moment, have certain interpersonal relationships, don't you? When you pass in your chips in a very relatively short space of time, in the next hundred years, you're a Scientologist, two hundred years, three hundred years — some short period of life, you pass in your chips and so forth, what you going to do with all these relationships? Possibly some of you were in Egypt, but — I had a little bit of an overt. It wasn't really an overt in Egypt. Dreamed up an idea back in Egypt that secured personal property. It said when any official of the court or man — any man of repute or renown in the area, died, when he came back, he could have his property back. That was pretty good. That worked pretty good. Remember that gimmick?

Actually, all the time he was a hoplite, he was very worried about his hair. He didn't have any — shaved head. Because the flavor of the opposition terminal to the hoplite, a court lady (this was the war which was going on between the valences), those characteristics are impressed across. And if you got him into the valence of a court lady, which you could very easily flip him into, you see, why, this court lady is always fixated about fixing up her breastplates, see — always hitching up her breastplates. And you call to her attention, "Now, listen, a girdle is slightly higher than that. That should be up here." But she keeps more or less hooking up her pants, you see. And that's her breastplate, see. It's confused, see? It is a real interesting hurdy-gurdy.

That fortuitous circumstance doesn't always exist on the track. You kick the bucket, you lose your friends, you lose your property and you've had it. As a matter of fact, the courts are rigged right now. You could go as far as to say that the courts are agin thetans. Agin 'em. When they declare a thetan legally dead, they want him to stay dead. And that's it.

The waterbuck — he'll tell you when you first find him as a waterbuck — he'll say, "Well, now . . ." You see, the package is waterbuck and tiger and you first find him as a waterbuck. He'll tell you, "Well, I was a different kind of waterbuck, actually, I wasn't the average run-of-the-mill waterbuck like those other waterbucks. I was a striped waterbuck. It was — there must have been a peculiar type of waterbuck on some planet or another that — well — some planet, someplace — you probably wouldn't have heard about it, because — waterbucks also had claws. They didn't have hoofs, they had claws. It was a very peculiar breed and they had horned tigers. They had tigers there and they ran around and had long horns and they didn't have any stripes. Oh, yeah, come to think about it, they had hoofs and they went like this, see, and when they walked they went like this, you know. That's right. And the water-buck had long, straight tails that went like this. Yeah, I've got it straight now, I think."

It's almost a high crime to come back after you're dead. Some of the most fantastic catastrophes have occurred because somebody who has been carefully pronounced legally dead by decree has turned up. Of course, it makes a lot of legal problems. A girl is married, the family's drifted off, it's all been split up by the will. Everything has been disposed of and he comes back and he says, "Where's my Jaguar?" "Oh well, dear, we gave that to the ashman, after all . . ." He has no legal recourse of any kind whatsoever. He has been pronounced dead and of course that is as dead as anybody ever gets.

"But I was a very peculiar kind of waterbuck and all I could think of was killing waterbucks, and that was my goal as a waterbuck." The pc will tell you this, wide, open-eyed, you know. "That was my goal as a waterbuck — was to kill waterbucks. Yeah, I was a peculiar kind of waterbuck — I did nothing but kill waterbucks."

But because the person loses all of his havingness, he gets even with it all by forgetting it. That is the last thing a thetan can do to get revenge.

"And the opposition terminal, a tiger — thirsty, all the time thirsty. And the tiger-the tiger's goal — you want the tiger's goal, tiger's goal, the tiger's goal. Well, that's very simple. The tiger's goal was to drink water. And the modifier is and swim if I can't, all the time. I think that must be it. The tiger's goal is to drink water and swim all the time." The pc will look at you very bright eyed — doesn't see anything wrong with this — perfectly logical to him — and very often will tell the auditor, "Well, it makes sense to me anyway!"

I don't know if you've ever heard a little kid — they're quite realistic some-times, little kids are. They aren't bowed down with all the responsibilities and "now-I'm-supposed-to's" of the adult. A little freer, you know. You were too, for a while. Also perhaps a little bit spookier. You know, after you've just kicked the bucket, you're kind of nervous for the next few years. You know, it kind of makes you nervous. People expect you to sleep in the dark. And you open your eyes in the dark and you don't know where you are. And you think maybe you're back in Korea or something of the sort. You're not quite sure where you have wound up at.

And after you have run it for a little while, the pc has this terrific cognition — terrific cognition. Of course, you didn't run it without straightening out the goals, you just sort of hung him with the goals straightened out. You said, "Well, now just to test this we will run the waterbuck with the goal to drink water and swim all the time. Now, just — just-just-just-experimentally." The pc will look at you, you know, and all of a sudden he will say, "Hey! Hey! Hey, auditor. Hey! Stop writing it all down there for a second. I got an idea! You know, I think that is the goal of the waterbuck. And you know, I think the — I'm no dummy. I think the tiger's goal is to kill waterbuck." Not every-body could figure that out, see. Because I will tell you frankly there is nobody more stupid about his terminal and package combinations than the pc. It just all seems to make sense and nothing makes any sense, and it's just one horrible confusion.

I don't know why many adults think it is a high crime to leave a light on in a child's room, but it saves more nightmares. See a child floundering around with a little dim light in his room and he'll open his eye, you know, and he'll look around — oh well, you know — go back to sleep again. That was just yesterday. That was just another year, another life, another nightmare. But a lot of adults say, "Well, a child should learn to sleep in the dark." I don't know. I never have. I've never learned to sleep in the dark with a total disorientation. Unless I couldn't put out any light. That seems to be a bit of a dull thing.

Well, after a while — you are running it for a little while — and the pc will have this terrific cognition and he'll look up suddenly bright eyed and he'll say, "You know, that's the tiger!" Actually they make very intelligent cognitions. As soon as they get — as soon as they get this straightened out one way or the other, they will say, "You know why a tiger has to have a tail?" And then they give you the anatomy of tigers and why tigers have to have stripes and why tigers have to have tails and how you build tigers and why tigers are and the basic purpose of tigers and where the first tiger came from, and so forth. And then they'll all of a sudden say, "You know this — the waterbuck, not the tiger. This is the tiger. Got it all straight now. Got it all straight now. Must be flat. Awwrf — must be very flat. I think it's flat now — pretty flat, isn't it? Flat."

You know what a dream is, don't you? A dream is merely an effort to orient oneself. A thetan is so disoriented he doesn't know where he is and he all of a sudden starts mocking things up in an effort to find out where he is — trying to duplicate the environment and his effort to duplicate the envoironment, is liable to mock up almost anything under the sun, moon and stars. You get the Capitol at Washington sitting on St. Paul's Cathedral, you know, all located on Marcab. And your effort to locate yourself is such a frantic affair, you find yourself running down Pennsylvania Avenue with no clothes on. The significance of a dream, however, is simply the effort to locate and it's nothing else.

And the auditor says, "Well, I think we better run this a while longer if it's all right with you. And we'll reassess it on the Prehav Scale and so forth." "Well, all right, if you say so — pretty flat though." About the third command, the solution to the problem is roar! "Yeah, how would a tiger solve the problem?" "Well, the tiger would solve the problem by roaring." And about that time he says, "Hey, you know, this funny bass voice that I've always talked with and thought it — that was a tiger's voice; that wasn't a waterbuck. That wasn't a waterbuck's voice. That wasn't the waterbuck's voice. Oh, that — that's — that's the waterbuck's voice." Yeah, he goes, "Tiger's voice, you know, and the waterbuck's voice. Oh yeah, well ... No wonder I have never been able to talk."

And you open one eye and look around and find out where you are and you go back to sleep because you might still be in that confounded tomb. You know the exteriorization from a body that's been embalmed is usually fairly easy. But sometimes you can't find the exit. Something like that happens.

Because these things are just mishmashed one in against the other by solid context — continuous. Now, you are aware of the old principle that when you fight something you start partaking of its characteristics, you know. If you want to be overwhelmed by something, resist the living daylights out of it. If you really want to overwhelm somebody, why, just sit there and say, "Okay, now, everything I tell you about Scientology, just resist. Argue with me. Now, I don't believe in a man who will just sit there quietly. Argue with me. I like an argument!" And then tell him this, that or the other thing and make him argue with each one of the things.

Well, all this, of course, is very wild conversation and would be classified as metaphysical and so forth by the more insane, learned members of our society, because they have gotten so even with everybody that they have for-gotten everything. That's about all it amounts to. Sometimes a little kid hasn't forgotten all the tricks and he's liable to look at you. He can't beat you up. You're nine times as tall as he is, something like that. So he gets even with you. He looks at you piercingly and he says, "I'll forget you."

What do you think has happened to the poor psychologist? What's going to happen to the psychiatrist up the track someplace? They'll be in a valence package called "Psychiatrist versus Scientologist" except the two actually don't make a good package. I can say more about that in a moment. But I'm just giving you some kind of an idea.

That's pretty near the thetan's last revenge. "I will forget you." Can't do much less than that. But you can actually — you think you do this to spare yourself the pain of remembering all of these past and uncomfortable things. You think that is why you were forgetting everything. That is not true at all. I can prove to you with a bingety-bang. You are simply getting even. You are a vengeful cuss. You is real revengeful. That's all right. I'm still a friend of yours, but I know that about you. And when you can't get even any other way, you forget things.

These things are in pairs and so you get what is called the story. Routine 3D has the colloquial phraseology of having a package, which is to say, what I showed you yesterday, which is a goal-opposition goal, opposition terminal, the modifier and the terminal. And you have the terminal with modifier, using the modifier, usually not the goal, against the opposition terminal, and you get quite a roar between these two things and quite a squeal going back. And they are terrifically intermixed, so that you have your inter-mixed package here toward the bottom. There'll be a package here and that is this one into this one, see — is your waterbuck and the tiger, and this gradually upgrades as you run it. But down through the millennia the characteristics of the waterbuck have continued throughout all of the pc's own terminals and the characteristics of the tiger have continued throughout all of his enemies. You know, you could always recognize his terminal and you can always recognize the opposition terminal, once you know any one opposition terminal or any one — any one terminal. You can always recognize these things.

This is so much true that if a person has a bad somatic, you can ask him any kind of a combination of questions. Has something to do with this. "Who would be upset if you forgot about that?" And you're liable to run out not only that somatic but a bunch more he didn't even know he had. You know, make us go bzzzzzzzt. You know, brrrrrrrr. Something like that.

So you've got another package just above this and it has the five elements in it, and these lower packages are appended to the upper package. And then you've got a bigger package and you know — I showed you yesterday. These are just all fantastic numbers of problems solved one way or the other and these are upgraded gradually as you come up the line here. You've got packages, packages, packages, see — terrific numbers of these things — and each one of them is this way.

"Whom have you forgotten about to get even with?" is the stylized question, see. "Who would be upset if you forgot?" And "Who would you get even with if you forgot?" and so forth. That actually is the shut-off on the whole track. Let's not put it on the fact of "us poor thetans," which we have been doing, you see — having been deprived of all of our property, friends and relatives, having been grossly maligned and laid in the grave with only second-grade embalming fluid, not the good stuff, now we're unable to remember because we've been done in. And that's why we have occlusions on the past. I'm afraid that is not the way it is. The thing you do is — having been laid in the grave and having knocked off the body, one can now get even with all those people further by forgetting all of them.

When you first see them, however, there is no vector or direction in them at all and some very clever fellow must have figured this out.

You see, forgetting people is an effort to unmock people. It's an effort to reduce them. It's an effort to make them disappear. You forget them, they disappear.

I don't think anybody could have figured it out — nobody human certainly. Anyhow — I mean I wasn't talking about me. Do you think I was talking about me? I'm not talking about me, I was talking about the fellow who dreamed it up originally.

Well, I'll give you an idea. What is the end product of swordplay? It's the destruction of a person. What is the end product of bullets? It's the obstruction or blowing up or obliteration of an individual, see? What is the end product of all weapons? What is the end product of all suits? Well, a suit is an effort to make somebody disappear by making his fortune disappear. See? Make a fortune disappear. You can't make him disappear, but you can make his bank account disappear. See? And by making his bank account disappear, who knows, you might be able to make him disappear, too. See how that _ works?

Now, you've got . . . These things are sort of dehydrated electronic standing waves that are totally drained out and completely black. And as you run the things, the pc can't see anything, he can't feel anything, he can't hear anything except "It hurts like hell!" And where the somatic is coming from and what's giving him the somatic, he hasn't a clue. You know? And if you are nice to — you are used to a nice time track, you are used to a nice time track that goes on and on and on and on — beautifully smooth time track — there is nothing to this time track at all. A beautiful time track, you know, incident after incident, picture after picture.

But when you can't finally do anything else — you can't turn loose with a 67-gauge blast pistol, disintegrator setting, 1,006. That's pretty good, you know. You just turn it up — phewww! Not even a pale pink mist. You're not embarrassed by blood or anything. If you can't do that, why, of course, you can stab him and let him rot. And that'll make him disappear. Destruction of beingness or valences or identities is almost a professional activity on the part of thetans.

"That was me going to school. That baby picture is me lying on a bearskin rug. And this is Aunt Hattie the day of the picnic." You know, you are used to a nice orderly time track like the old family album, you know. "This was me when I used to be a rocket jockey." You know, except you really don't show them to anybody. You have stopped doing that. I think — I think it's a custom that should be revived, you know. You are used to this kind of time track.

And when they can't destroy them anymore, physically, they can always make a last final effort. They can forget them and sort of tell themselves that they've done it. See how that is? You see, if you forget somebody, he's disappeared, at least for you. Well, and who knows, we might be able to tell ourselves and console ourselves that he disappeared for him, too.

Well, look. The time track is around the fringes of these things. This whole thing is a time track and this whole thing is a time track. And here's a whole time track and here's a whole time track and here's a whole time track. Here's a whole time track and here's a whole time track and here is one and here's one and here's one and here's one. Of course these things just keep going on, on upgrade, you see — bigger and bigger ones, bigger and bigger. Each one of these things has got a complete time track and all the time track is in a grouper. And you also got valences all over the sun, moon and stars. You've got valences all over the place that sit outside the Goals Problem Mass that have never troubled you in the least that have a nice, beautiful, laid-out time track.

There is nothing more disheartening than some fellow who has divorced a wife and forgotten her and she's gone out of his life and that is it. Once in a while he has a little twinge of conscience. He remembers her and he realizes that she is probably living in poverty, you know — in dire circumstances, you see — probably down by the railroad tracks in an old hovel made of tin cans and boxes, see. And down on Main Street one day, she drives past in her new Lincoln driven by a chauffeur. It's hard on him, because he's forgotten her. And it — suddenly realizes it didn't work. "Failed forgetting" then becomes a live button on his case.

You've got one over here — beautiful laid-out time track — it isn't against anything, see. And you run the preclear on the backtrack and you — he runs down the time track and he can pick up these facsimiles and he can run them out. All that's lovely so long as you don't come near this mess.-

"What forgettingness has failed to accomplish a make nothing out of?" That's what the disintegration of a valence and a being is. The odd part of it is, is having fooled oneself into the fact that it is gone and convinced oneself that it is gone, one continues to have ulcers, pains in the back of the neck, bad eyesight, staggers around. He's not quite sure what he's doing and an auditor comes along. He says, "I'll run those out. You're simply trying to get even with your mother, mother-in-law, your husband or something of the sort, and I'll just get this off and everything will be fine." And he runs some off and it diminishes. It diminishes. Doesn't disappear. These things must be located someplace else than in the here and now. They must be located some-place else.

And all of a sudden one day your foot slips running a nice smooth time track. "This was me as a baby in cave days. This was me as a man. This is the marrying customs which were utilized in cave days." You know, clank! "And here's a nice picture of Uncle Ben that time of the famine when we had to practice cannibalism; we are not very proud of that one, so I have always — have trouble running it." And you're showing somebody off this way — you're looking them over, see. And look, watch now, watch the trick, see? "This — this is a forty-foot-high tiger, this one here, see, but it's all squashed, see. And we've been very, very careful — we've never come near that one. And here is a picture of a small saber-tooth tiger. I wonder what's the matter with that corner of it. I wonder what's the matter with that co — there — that corner of it doesn't seem to be quite right. Oh, Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Where's my beautiful time track? Ron took my time track away from me!" Ah, he may drift out of this. Of course, he sooner or later would have run into the thing anyhow. That's for sure, he would have run into it. He has in the past. He'll run into it again and he'll fall into it and fall out of it.

And they are. They're a past beingness he has unsuccessfully made nothing out of because he hasn't made nothing out of any beingness he has ever had in the last two hundred trillion years. He's got them all. And those things with their problems and because they are in play and counterplay and identity against one another in the most complicated series of games anybody ever heard of — jammed together into a total black mass, and you call — this is the Goals Problems Mass.

Now, whatcha do when you clear a man? When you clear somebody, 1961 type Clear, what you do is key this thing out and you set the fellow up with a consecutive time track. Here he is — a consecutive time track that is pretty nicely laid out up here someplace. It isn't likely to key in to that. And he's perfectly all right until someday, tomorrow, next week, next year or in the next century, he all of a sudden says, "That's a funny looking airplane. The left wing of it is all black." There he goes and he becomes very unhappy about the thing. That's key-out — clearing by key-out.

When you start taking it apart, you find it's composed of nothing but identities. And each identity in it has its own thoughts. It has its own supposed-to's. It has its own goals. It has its own methodology of destruction. It has its own training patterns. It has its own habits, and so forth — the most marvelous potpourri you ever saw. If this were of any possible use to anybody at this particular time, we would say, "Well, by all means, let's go on using it." But it is no use to anybody. At this stage of the game, he's completely lost the map. He reaches over to put on the lion tamer, you see, and he gets a mouse. He starts teaching school. There he is teaching school, standing up in front of the children, and he knows exactly how to do this. All he has to do is reach into the old bag of tricks and pull out of this coal-black, agglutinous piece of asphalt, just a nice valence as a schoolteacher, you see._

Now, fortunately for us this whole Goals Problem Mass is hung together by no more than a few dozen pairs. And after that it disintegrates and these things straighten out and go together again.

So he pulls it out and he puts it on. Only when he got it, it was a general. Has trouble with the school board — always in trouble with the school board. Funny part of it is he doesn't even know that he's wearing a valence of a general. He's still convinced that he is wearing the valence of a school-teacher, even at that moment when he picks up the kid's toy pistols, you see, and as they've been playing in the schoolyard ... It all fits very well, you see, and it all works very well, and so forth, and — but he just keeps saying to himself all the time — because it's hung up; he can't express it, you see — "Sir, take this man to the firing squad."

It is a fantastic accident that you get an exact balance in any game. It's a fantastic accident. It is almost unthinkably an accident. A person starts out and he's going to be a self-respecting priest. Now, he has been a priest before and he'll be a priest again, he thinks. But in this particular instance he becomes a priest with the exact electronic output of the priest, comes up against a type of problem and becomes a priest thoroughly and wholly which — no pun intended — and is backed up against a valence opposite to it of exactly comparable magnitude. And he — every time he tries to solve this problem — chugs into the other valence and it reacts against him in almost exactly and equally the same amount of force. And when he does this often enough — he gets in this fight often enough — it's something like this:

You see, this keeps going through his head all the time. And he — little Johnny comes up and says, "nyaa, nyaa" and his nose is running, he's been making a lot of noise and he's been teasing one of the girls and so forth. And he walks up there and he opens his mouth to say some automatic phrase that requires no effort of any kind whatsoever. You see, he knows. He's a school-teacher. Therefore, he'll say exactly the right thing with the greatest of ease. It's all on automatic. And he said, "Sir, you are hereby condemned to death under articles of war and so-and-so and so-and-so on," you know?

Let's say the United States and Russia went to war. And they kind of quit because nobody won, and then they went to war and they kind of quit because nobody won, and they went to war and they kind of quit because nobody won, and they went to war and they quit because nobody won and they went to war and they quit because nobody won. The next thing you know, the air between here and Russia would be in an awful mess. It would all be scrambled up. Now, we'd have problems. And you'd start having Americans around who would — who would — well, they'd have this — they couldn't quite understand this but they couldn't drink anything but vodka, see. And they couldn't fight anything but Russians and a Russian wasn't a Russian unless he had a portable radio. And you'd find out that their uniforms had flip-flopped; the American troops are wearing Russian uniforms; the Russians are wearing American uniforms, always. Only this has flip-flopped again until eventually they are dressed exactly alike and battles are very difficult because you can never tell who's friend and foe. I'm just trying to give you some wild example of a Goals Problem Mass in its accumulation.

After he's done this a couple of times, he checks it. Little Johnny comes up to him again and he's been trying to say, "I'm going to spank you if you do that again, you know," so he says, "Ah, go back to your seat."

Well, it has to be very, very accidental and it has to be very well balanced and it has to be terrifically — you know, "there it is." And in auditing it, all you have to do is unbalance it. And when you unbalance it, this half is held in place by the volume and magnitude of this half and this half is held in place by the volume and magnitude of that half. And all you have to do is unbalance either one and it starts going into shredded wheat. All you do is upset — not the balance of nature — but the balance of beingness, and the problem starts ceasing to be a problem because a problem is mass — countermassmass — mass. And if they're not exactly in balance, they don't stand well balanced on the whole track.

Now, wrong game, wrong body, wrong training pattern. Put a guy down at the filling station. He's busy filling up trucks, and so forth. Works out all right. Kind of gets on his boss's nerve occasionally. The only thing you could get out of the ragbag in the way of a valence and the only thing he could do in the way of a valence and so forth, and the only thing he could get, was a dog. He keeps going up sniffing at the cars as they come in. He knows it's wrong. He knows he ought to act right, you know? He knows he's supposed to test the oil and water, you know. Can't get along.

Now, because some of these things stay in balance, other things that are not quite in balance can then hang up on one of these things that's totally in balance. And your Goals Problem Mass starts accumulating and it gets bigger and bigger! And it takes on — until at last anytime the person tries to be anything, he immediately will find an opposition terminal of some kind or another to oppose him. And this will hang up and he never can solve any of his problems. And this is life and this is the way he lives. This is the way everybody lives these days, as a matter of fact.

The odd part of it is nobody is more baffled than the person who has grabbed the wrong hat. Nobody's more baffled than he is. He'll come around and tell you, too, and he is — he says, "The funniest thing . . ." He doesn't let most people in on that, "but every time I take off a radiator cap, you see, every time — I unscrew the radiator cap, you know, you always have a little trouble with them because your claw — I mean your finger — and sniff, sniff ..."

You come up, you get your opposition and that's fine. And your life — you live your life and you have got a problem. Life is a problem and there it goes from there on out and it all hangs up into the Goals Problem Mass. And you have got this heaviness and these headaches and things like this and boy it really takes something to accumulate a permanent somatic. That is really a trick. I congratulate a thetan when he has accumulated a permanent mass of this particular character. I think it took some doing. It was well worth his effort, I am sure, because it gave me such a hard time trying to figure out how to take it apart. I think that would be about the end product of it. Has no value.

He says, "But my worst trouble is when I pass the air pressure post."

But these packages are now beautiful "I-am-supposed-to's." As one pack-age, if it stood isolated and alone, it would — might be quite useful. But as a matter of fact, because it has partaken of all the characteristics of its enemy, it never stands isolated and alone and is therefore never useful because the second one starts to dramatize it, one dramatizes the other side. The house-wife being a housewife is a housewife right up to the moment until she meets her husband and at that moment a valence, boss, turns on. And she never can quite understand exactly why this happens. When she is away from him she feels perfectly all right and she is perfectly willing to be a housewife. And she runs into this guy and she says, "Do this! Do that! Snap and pop," you know. She actually feels like he is an employee. She keeps records and time schedules of his goings and comings. She even sort of says to him occasionally that he shouldn't put in too much overtime. This doesn't make any sense to him because he is being a police official with opposition terminal, wife.

He thinks he's crazy. He isn't crazy. As a matter of fact, he's acting perfectly. He's acting at the exact dictates and is the exact effect of a perfectly complex, perfectly adequate training pattern, thinkingness pattern, everything else. All perfectly adequate for another place, another day, another dollar, another dog, but not for a filling station. Not for a filling station. Fellows pick up lives and they're very successful lives and they don't want to get out of them. Fellow will pick up lives. They're very unsuccessful lives and they can't get out of them, see.

One of my minor packages I ran into — it really made me laugh when I ran into this particular thing. The terminal is police official but I have never been able to under — to stand cops. Done a lot of police work — never approved of it. The terminal: police official. Yeah.

And although they were pronounced dead, Lord knows how long ago, they're still living that life someplace in their beingness. And the only trouble is they can't even count on living that life. They've lived enough others that sometimes it's a hurdy-gurdy. Every time they talk to a woman they feel like a man. Every time they talk to a man, they feel like a woman. See, it isn't a matter of a one-valence proposition. See, they shift during the day under climatic conditions.

That was just a minor package and when I passed by that thing I almost split a gut, you know. I often wonder how did I answer up when I was given a parking ticket? You know. I must have answered up in a very feminine way. That was the oppterm, you see. I must have treated every cop I ran into like a girl or something. You know, very confused, you can't quite figure out what you would have done or why you would have done it. And fortunately it has never been put to the test because it has never been used. But that's just because it's all part of this mess.

Get into a car. You're an airplane pilot. Get into an airplane, you're at the dog races. Okay? It's a mix-up, you know. There's just no telling what a guy's going to be next. That's most thetans' motto on this particular planet.

Interesting game, perhaps a marvelous game inside its own self — perhaps if you could play the game — if you could come anywhere near it — if it made any sense. Yeah, I can see me now in the Marcab Confederacy. Things have sort of gone to hell and all gone wrong and I couldn't get a job and so forth. And I go down and get the job of Chief of Police or something of the sort and then insist that everybody sweep the station house out very cleanly. I knew how to be a police official — always fixing the staff spaghetti dinners. Remarkable. And of course, "that's what you are supposed to do," and "every-body knows that," and "everybody does that," and "that is the natural thing to do."

Somebody gets very distracted, you know, and they're tearing their hair — very distracted. They're absolutely ripping themselves apart. They feel life has really ganged up on them. They always say, "I don't know what's going to happen next. I don't know what I'm going to do next." Well, they ought to modify the statement a little bit. "I can't tell what I'm going to be next."

There's a lot of guys right now driving cars that maybe have a valence of tank driver. And a tank driver, of course, always has an enemy tank driver. And they find themselves in a vehicle which is moving forward, they see another vehicle moving forward, they know what to do. Crunch! And then by golly the police come around, you know, and they act like you shouldn't have done it. That's what is surprising — the complete unreasonability of the world around you. How completely unreasonable the world around you is. They don't understand. Stupid of them, but they don't.

It's very, very astonishing. A thetan is getting along fine. She's being a housewife. Husband is coming home. Going to cook a nice dinner, so forth. It's all — it's all taped, see. Everything is fine. And she's got everything on the table and in the stove and so forth. And she even rehearses and says, "I'll go up to the door and I'll kiss him on the cheek and I'll say, 'Hello, honey, have you had a good day?' That's what I'll say. 'Hello, honey, have you had a good day?' See? It's all set and so forth. I'll take him in and I'll set him down and I'll really make him happy."

I can just see this police chief now, you know. The cops — they've been going along for years. They've just been, you know, throwing cigar butts on the floor and throwing old blackjacks on the floor and throwing other things on the floor and dropping their coats on the floor and hanging up everything in old closets, you know.

She goes and she — zero hour approaches, see. She rushes up to the front door just the moment she hears him coming up the steps and she opens the front door. And she says, "You big baboon, I'm going back to Mother." And spends the rest of the evening trying to patch it up. She can't do it so she knows how to patch it up. She used to be a cop.

There was a scrub bucket in city hall once but somebody lost it shortly after the building was built, you know. I can see their lockers with their slickers and boots and that sort of thing, you know — every kind — kind of spilling out, you know. And the guns beautifully cleaned up and very handy and very ready, you know — riot guns in racks just as you pass out every door. You see, you could pick out a riot gun just like that — tear-gas bombs — everything all slicked up, you see.

He can be especially lucky if she has never been Lucrezia Borgia, you see. As far as wives are concerned — I'll tell you guys, you gentlemen in the audience — as far as wives are concerned, boy, you really take a chance. You think you're marrying one girl, you see. I'd say at an absolute minimum, she had something on the neighborhood of well, let's be conservative — hundreds of billions of beingnesses that she could be. She's been hundreds of billions of people and she isn't anybody just now. It's sort of like playing roulette. Only she's liable to be three different people in the same day.

And then I take over, see. Well, see, the mere fact of being a police official with an opposition terminal of "wife" would bring about this state of affairs: Every time you found you were police official, why, a great many of your characteristics and behavior patterns would become those of a wife. Naturally you can see how this game would get going. As a police official you hang about fifteen or twenty girls that have been murdering their husbands and after that you've had it, you see.

I'll tell you girls something. Boy, that's nothing. Man, that's nothing. Boy, what you married. He's got just as many valences as you have, with a slight difficulty that he has a little more physical strength probably in this particular lifetime, and it's geared up economically so he can abreact his hostilities a bit better depending on which valence is coming up.

So, all right, so you move into city hall and you say, "Well, that's it." And for a few days you let this go, you don't bother with this very much, and then you sort of wake up one morning and you just — you know something isn't right. And you go down to city hall and you look around; you look around very carefully and you can't quite lay your finger on what it is, and you sit down at your desk and then all of a sudden you know what it is. You know what it is. And you send a sergeant and so forth scattering on down the street to the local hardware store and you get some scrub buckets, brother, you get some scrub buckets. And they come back up and you get that floor scrubbed. You know how to do your job.

You ask him for some money to run the house or something like that. The miser valence comes on. That's his terminal at that minute. He's upset. He's more upset than you are. He's wondering why he's saying this, you know. "Well, how come I'm saying this?" You know. He's sorry inside there. "What did I say, you know?" "And I so detest cliches; to have actually said, 'Do you think money grows on trees?' " You know? It's no wonder people stammer.

And you get some hangers around there and you get some clothes brushes and so forth, and you get those coats and hats hung up — you get those hung up in the right places. And those old lockers and old closets and so forth, all got men's things in them, so you just throw those in the garbage can and get them hauled away very quickly. It never occurs to you that the rain gear is going to be needed very shortly, but it looks pretty messy and after all it serves them right.

The thought goes through and then they have to say the right thing, you see? But life barreling along any old way, no telling what might happen. But it's a bit of randomity that doesn't make anybody happy. If it made anybody happy, well, all right, leave it alone. Funny part of it is, you reactivate some of these valences and you'll find something very interesting. Fellow who has a miser valence can't even be a good miser. He's a lousy miser. That's all I object to. It's bad acting, bad stagecraft, bad livingness. Shakespeare said all the world is a stage. Well, this guy — the performance he puts on as a miser — let me tell you — I mean, bad show, very bad show. It's not up to The Merchant of Venice. Let me tell you. Nothing like that. No, his performance of a miser has watered down to this "Oh, you want some money to run the house. Is that it, dear?" He's almost broke at the bank, you see. "Would a thousand dollars be enough?" See, he can't be a good miser, you know. He's got to fight the valence.

And if we don't tell them about it, they will never find out about it anyway, see. So that's the right way to run a police station. There — you think, "Well everything is all right now." Except it isn't quite all right. There's some-thing still wrong in this police station; there's something still wrong in this police station. You begin to realize it looks like a den. It does; it begins to look like a study or a gun room or something of the sort — all these guns! Guns, you know, all along the wall. Guns, you know — hand grenades and tear-gas bombs and ... Well, who'd want those in a parlor? All right, so you get lockers made down in the basement, see. You get the lockers made down in the basement, only they're made like benches and there's chintz curtains hung up above them and back of them, you see. And you put all of these nasty things in these boxes, you see, and you put all of these tear-gas bombs and that sort of thing — you put them away and you lock that up pretty carefully.

All right. This fellow's got a valence as a cop. Criminal walks up to him. He walks up to a criminal. He knows what he's supposed to say. "I arrest you in the King's name" or something of the sort. You know? Depends on whether or not he's in Washington or New York. "I must warn you that everything you say will be used against you," you see. He's got himself all beefed up to this. He sat up, you know, in the night, and he said, "I'm going to arrest this guy tomorrow, and so on, and I'm going to say, 'I arrest you in the King's name.' Yes, I've got to, you know. 'I must warn you that anything you say will be used against you.' I'll go over that again." He steps in front of the mirror and he looks sour, you know, and he looks mean, you know, " . . . used against you, and so forth. Got you now." Got it taped, see. He knows how to arrest some-body. He's all set.

Three days later there's a riot, the police force is wiped out and you don't have to worry about the terminal anymore because you're not there and what a relief that is.

Next day he walks up to the criminal. He says, "You got a match, buddy?"

Afterwards you get to wondering about this. You're sitting up on a cloud someplace and you say, "You know, if I had just cleaned the place up a little better, it wouldn't have happened." You — just — the whole logic of it is — totally eludes you; you just haven't a clue. You never find out what you did wrong.

The sergeant says, "We sent you out to get Black Bill, the upper town mobster. Where is he?"

You are being audited someday. Ages afterwards, you are being audited one day and you are sitting there in the chair minding your own business and the auditor, we hope, is minding your business. And he's got the meter — he's looking at the meter there. He's looking at the meter and he says, "What's that? What did you just think of?" "I was thinking about police official." "Ah, all right, we'll put that on the list: Police official, lawyer, judge, etc." He makes a long list of these things, goes down the list, nulls them all out and you sit there looking at "police official." "Oh," you say, "that's very interesting. Yeah, I can see how this would be; doesn't seem very important. Well, it isn't very important; it's a downgraded package but let's get it anyhow here." And you are going on. "All right, well what — who or what would oppose a police official?" "Oh, a crook, a criminal, a blackmailer, a this, a that, the city hall, the mayor, the this, that." We make a nice, long list of "Who or what would oppose a police official?" you see. Ah, that's good — that. We finally null it all out — that he did — don't null it all out and he says, "Well, are there any more?" He's saying, "No, no, I don't think there are." He said, "Well it's still ticking on the meter here."

And he says, "Well, he wasn't home." He says, "You know, I must be yellow."

It's what's called "bleeding the meter" for additional terminals, see.

No, he isn't yellow. He's got a valence as a cop and he mustn't be it. And that is the common denominator of all valences. If you've got one, you mustn't be it. And if you be it, you feel guilty. You just mustn't really be the valence which you are. So these packages are totally useless. They're totally wasted. Anybody could be a better cop than a fellow who has a lot of past lives as a cop. Quite amazing. Anybody could be a better miser than a fellow who has a long, successful career as a miser and is now in valence form. Anybody could be better than anybody with a valence.

"Are there any more?" You say, "Oh, well, if it comes to that there could be a father, a mother, a woman of ill fame. I think that's all." "All right, well good. Are there any more? There's still a action here on this Mark IV; there's still an action." "Well, well, a wife, a wife, of course — well, there's always a wife — everybody knows that." And we put that down and he nulls them all out carefully and you find yourself sitting there with "a wife." See?

I'll give you an idea. I had a valence kicking around. First time I ever realized that this valence had any real suppressive characteristics with regard to me, is after it had been run pretty flat. I was sitting down at my desk and I all of a sudden did an operation with a pencil and fixed it up and suddenly realized that I hadn't been — ever been able to do sketching. And I all of a sudden — I mean engineering drawing, you know. I was educated in that field and I could never do this. You know, sketch drawing and perspective. And I sketched a drawing and handed it over to somebody and told them to build it, and everything was fine, you know. And I said, "Well, what the hell happened? I've never been able to do that before." And I suddenly realized I had run out the guy who was able to do that. Spooky, huh? In other words, I had run out the thing and had been able to do it. God help anybody who has a terminal as a racetrack driver that gets his hands on a racing car.

You look this over, whether you run it or not, and all of a sudden: Marcab Confederacy, cleaning out the police station, clean floors — "Oh, no, that's why we lost that city! Now we know!" Of course, you're the only one that knows. The other birds had their terminals and their reasons for losing the city. But all gets revealed and it's such a relief because it has been a problem ever since.

We had an example of that at Saint Hill. She was afraid to get in cars; afraid to drive a car and the car always broke down. Terminal: racetrack driver. You'd think she'd drive like mad. Actually, she was driving at about ten miles an hour when she couldn't go slower.

So the Goals Problem Mass package itself introduces so many problems into life and action that it itself becomes a problem. And then everything you do and why you do it becomes a problem and that is why it turns into this horrible mess. Because problems are just added to problems, added to problems, added to problems till everything you do is a problem. You can't do anything without having an opposition terminal, without having it lock up on something.

No. A thetan fights his valences and he can't be them. And they limit his skill and ability and they are the primary limiters of ability. If you can't be what you want to be, you probably are "it" in a valence. Then you won't ever accomplish being what you want to be until you got loosened up enough and recognized enough that you don't have to be it and then you can do it and be it. Isn't that interesting? What an interestingly complicated piece of nonsense.

And you try to run these — you try to run these out as an engram or something of the sort. It doesn't run. Why doesn't it run? You have to run the whole Goals Problems Mass before it's finally run out. But it discharges the other way.

But the Goals Problem Mass is composed totally of all of these beingnesses which have accumulated all of these eons and ages on down the line. You'll find them in anybody. Now I'm not talking through my hat. It's very easy to do. You should see the look come over a pc's face when you've assessed it all the way down, and he was working at it, you know. And he — you worked at it and you assessed it, you know, running a Routine 3D or something, and you get it down the line. And you get it there and you finally get the item. And the moment you get the item, he of course has been kind of afraid that was it all along, you know.

That's 3D in action. I have given you too simple a look on how to run it. I assure you there can only run — be run with the greatest expertness of E-Metering. But it can be run. Auditors can run it. They are capable of running it; they are capable of learning these skills when they study them hard. And pcs can live through it. Even I. Even I. So, you, of course, could live through it — that would be much easier.

He is instantly alert. He is very happy to have the item and nobody is more pleased to get this item in the world. Valence: skunk. See? You say, "Well, that's what came out of it: skunk."

But en route you have your doubts as to whether you could live through it or not and those doubts may or may not be well founded depending on how well your auditor is trained.

And he said, "Well, I'll be damned. So that's why I've had to use perfume all my lifetime. Yeah, that's right. That's right. I got a black fur coat and I insisted on having a white mink stripe put in the back of it, you know."

Thank you.

And he starts to check it up. All the habit patterns that's made him worry about him are all contained in this silly package which is the central package. All these things are completely interwoven. They explain all of his actions to him. He knows now what he has been doing and why he has been doing it.

Thank you.

Then you find his opposition terminal and of course he knows what he's been fighting all the time. There is what he has been fighting. "Well, of course!" he always says, you know? It would be so much easier, however, if seventy-five hours before he had walked up to you, and he had said, "Well, I'm a skunk and my opposition terminal is a perfume factory." It'd have been so much simpler. He always acts like he knew it all the time, you see. But he — I haven't had any of them yet really tell me until I found out because, you see, he has to find out, too. He hasn't known either. Well, so much for Goals Problem Masses and 3Ds.

I wish you very, very good hunting when you find yours.

Thank you.